So... unless you've been living under a rock (or are Uncle Andy) you know who the Roloff Family is. They're the family on Little People, Big World (Monday's @ 8:00PM on TLC). Well, since the show has been on, I've been wanting to make a trip to get pumpkins there; lucky for us, they're located just outside of Portland.
Anyway, after getting away from a few party poopers, and the shop staff being almost as excited as me, I decided to do a "Starfire Staff Bonding" trip as a reward for putting up with me as a boss. The trip was beyond AMAZING!!! The whole trip is still all sinking in, it was completely surreal. To be honest, I couldn't have daydreamed a better day. We were treated like celebrities (people were even asking who we were, thinking we were famous), we made new friends, and are beginning a new tradition.
So... here's a bit of the day. There just isn't enough space, time, or words to lay it all out!!
Here's where the day began... (literally). Megan definitely captured almost ALL of the drive there. This picture is us on the road... before we even hit Redmond. There are even pictures of bugs we killed on the windshield, however, those I'll save for my private stash.
Yeah... We survived Government Camp!!
(Ask anyone of the Starfire girls about the mounds of **** taller than the seats in the blue rooms.)
Karli & Lindsay channeling Billy Idol. I guess 3 hours in the truck can get pretty boring.
Not too long later, we started rolling (dirty) through Sandy. I was trying to be cool and be a name dropper; we were driving by Tollgate Inn and I said, "My dads cousin owns that restaurant." The girls were flattering me and looking at the building and we see Uncle Andy's car parked right out front, and Aunt Linda's truck too. It was too funny, we had to flip a bitch (which was entertaining in the truck, and involved a sideroad) and went back to say hello. We tried to surprise them, but they saw us... something about pink hair. Well, in true nonchalant style, we honked the horn, the air horn, as we left. The Tollgate Inn will never be the same; I guarantee they won't be name dropping me anytime soon.
Can you believe some punk won America's Funniest Home Video's with a "video" of this sign? Me neither, yet I was the asshole who said, "Make sure to get a picture of it."
OMG!! We're almost there!!
... and so are a ton of other people!!
I must say, Black Betty (my truck) was a big hit!! As soon as we pulled up, we got VIP parking right up front!! Thanks Roloff Family Friends :)
"Do you want to smell my skunk?"
Huh? As soon as we got parked, and past the tons of staring people, we were a little bit lost (and overwhelmed), so we walked to the first thing we saw. A little area with animals. So, of course, trying to make everyone friends like I tend to do, I felt bad for this guy who wasn't really talking to anyone. And I may be an amazing bs-er, but what do you say to a guy about a skunk? "Does it stink?" Big mistake, he asked me to smell it. Well, with a whole group watching us, I had to do it. To be totally honest, it wasn't bad, just smelled a little dusty. FYI.
Once everyone was all friendly and talking (mission accomplished), the girls started pretending they were Britney Spears. Just kidding, but that's all I could think of when I saw this picture.
Here's the old Trebuchet...
(side note, this picture was a lot harder to get than it looks :)
Lindsay was so clever at sneaking pics when no one was looking... I just really didn't care. As soon as I pointed out that this was Sven, the handyman guy who helps out around the house, we had to get a pic. I'm pretty sure he was oblivious to Lindsay's picture taking. Yet for mine, he's staring right at the camera :)
I have to say, we were waiting in line for our tour when I spotted Sven. I was damn determined to meet at least one Roloff. Then to my surprise I saw Jeremy driving a tractor for the tour. I was the dumb idiot pointing and taking pics. So, after this, I was set on the fact that a Roloff HAD to drive our group. I tried to ask for a "private tour", but the lady wasn't budging.
We were waiting in line discussing how many times we'd be willing to go on the same tour to make sure we got the guide we wanted. 87 was the highest. Well, we were right at the front of the line, and look who comes around the corner!! I have to say I kept trying to sweet talk everyone, especially this one guy I thought looked official (come to find out he was with the film crew and couldn't pick who drove the tours), and kept calling "dibs" on Jeremy as our tour guide!! It worked. And not only did it make our experience that much more fun, our tour guide was a little hottie. (I know I'm too old to say that, but I did anyway).
Lindsay gets the credit for this spotting. While we were barely containing our excitement about our tour, we almost missed Zach tying his shoes on the back stairs. Again with me acting like an idiot, pointing and waving... but good shot Megan.
So, I have to say that the swingset Dad made for us as kids, does not nearly compare to Matt Roloff's vision. (haha Dad :) A Tower of Terror, Tree Fort and Castle. I guess Andie's "fort" on logs with the door from a camper was kinda the same.
As soon as we got back from the first "tour" Jeremy ran off to talk to his Dad(I think he was scared we were going to try to talk to him). Of course, I'm the idiot pointing and taking pictures again. How weird must it be to talk with the camera guys hanging out?
As soon as we got off the wagon, the woman came directly up to me and said, "Make sure that you don't bug Zach & hold up the line." Listening to people's directions never got you anywhere good anyway...
I was so stoked about meeting the boys, that I couldn't think of anything to talk about (I know, me with nothing to talk about... unheard of). But, I really like this pic of me standing next to Zach. Plus, I love his shirt... it says, "When the going gets tough... go somewhere else."
The Starfire girls love the Roloff twins!!
(Again, we were still not listening to the lady)
Dad this pic is for you... not just because it's a picture of a shitter. But also because is says "Schulzy" too bad they spelled it wrong.
Since our day ended up being so star-studded thus far, I felt like I needed a picture with or of everyone I'd seen on the show. Rocky the dog was no exception. However, he was not all about the picture session. So, here's a picture of me and Rocky's butt :) I think he must be related to Chopper in some weird way... they're both allergic to camera's.
Wait, wait... Megan saw Rocky turn around!! So I ran back over for my photo op. Sun in my eyes, and toilet paper in my hand.
I love this picture!! Zach was posing for pictures with people, but was distracted by our beauty. Well, that's what I'd like to think, I'm sure he was probably thinking, "Who the hell are those crazies." But it makes me feel better to think he thought we were hot bombers... don't burst my bubble!!
Can you say holiday card? We are a photogenic bunch!!
These are our new friends Eileen and Santa Bob from Idaho. How cool is it that we went on a trip and made new friends? We will be seeing them in the future, I just have a feeling. We already made plans to make a reunion run to Roloff Farms with them next year!!
P.S. - Thanks for saving us a spot in line for the 2nd tour!! When the women in line were being catty because we were cutting, they shut right up when they saw Santa was saving us a spot!!
Here a pic of the Western Town. I guess this would be the equivilent of the tool shed for us growing up. (Don't worry Dad, I'm sure your Father of the Year award is in the mail).
I have to say, this might have been my favorite meeting of the day. I absolutely love Grandpa Roloff!! Look how fun we are: Ron, Peggy (Papa & Honey) & Molly!! I could totally be a Roloff too!!
Okay, I'm finally done being selfish... we're all in the picture!!
So... here's the story: Grandpa Roloff came over and started BSing with me. To be honest, I know it was one of my favorite conversations ever, but I can't even think about how to lay it all out. A couple of my favorites were when we started talking about piercings and tattoos and I suggested we go get one together. (To be honest, he totally considered it). He proceeded to tell me that he loved artists (his wife is one) and that he thought the world would be too boring if we all looked the same. He also said that owning a piercing studio was "a very honest way to make a living." Then we talked about how even though he was a Marine, he could tell if someone was a good person if they had feelings and could show them. I could have stayed and talked with him all afternoon, but our tour was on the way out. He walked us over and even high-fived me on the way out. See you next year Grandpa Roloff!! (Maybe we'll get tattoos together then...)
Jeremy Roloff Loves Us!!
OMG!! We are right up close, next to Matt... Here I am loading the pumpkins in the truck, too nervous to speak. Then Matt looks over and says, "Look at that truck, I think I need one of those."
Well the girls kept coaxing me... "Go talk to him", "Don't be nervous", "You know you'll regret it if you don't". Well, that got me... they were right. So, I walked over and asked if I could get a picture with him. He was SOOO... nice. I even got to hop in the Mule with him!!
Sidenote: Matt was so cool, he came up to get a hot dog from the booth and even paid for it!! He owns the property, is the guy in charge, and was still such a standup guy he paid for his snack.
The whole gang piled in with Matt Roloff!!
Look, Look... Little People, Big World.
(Sorry Mom, if you had cable, you could actually watch it. You can download it on iTunes.)
Isn't it sad for all the people who only get to sit in front of this sign and never really get to meet the Roloff's? I should feel bad for them, and I also should not gloat, but WE MET THE ROLOFF'S!! I do have to say, I have many dreams of meeting (and being friends with) Amy. There's always next year!!
WE LOVE YOU ROLOFF FARMS!!!
The day was absolutely amazing. The stories will be told for a long time...
Of course, we couldn't end a trip to Portland without the finale at New York, NY. Sorry we took so long and missed you Aunt Linda. I loved the new sign, so it made a nice background.
P.S. - Uncle Andy... you kept talking about how your bartender was also a photographer... Well, he was a photographer who managed to get 2 pictures with my eyes closed. :) So, just tell people I did cool eyeshadow.
Go look at the website... you can learn more about the Roloff's.
Plus, you can order Matt's book. I already bought it and stayed up the first 2 nights we got home and read the whole thing. It makes me want to be an adopted Roloff even more. Funniest part is I felt somehow associated with them because in the foreward of the book, Matt thanks Ken Ruettgers for mentoring him while writing the book. And since we used to live up the street from them... well, it all made sense in my head. Anyway, it took me 2 more days to realize he's on the cover of the book with Matt. Crazy good book, easy to read... Lindsay's got my copy. When she's done, someone else can borrow it... but it may be 2010. (j/k Lindsay)
